Thursday, July 1, 2010

Last summer days in New York

So, I've been keeping it mum for awhile, but I might as well out with it now - I have 3 weeks left in NYC. I'm moving back home to Texas! Now, maybe you understand why I was asking you for "assignments"? I made a list of things I must do in my last days here...

My last days here - yikes that sounds so bleak - sort of like I'll be dead soon. I must choose better words. :) It's such an in-between time, feeling neither here nor there, completely. I feel all kinds of ups and downs - happy to be here, overjoyed to be going home, sad to leave, a bit frightened of the big change.

But you know, I felt the same way when I moved here 6 years ago - aside from the person I was dating, I didn't know a soul here. It was the scariest step I'd ever taken in my life. And now, here I am - in just the course of this past year I've formed friendships with people - amazing people who inspire me in every possible way. I've done things I would have never imagined. I'm filled with joy.

It's all mixed with a bit of sadness, of course. Last night I found out that a kind old gentleman from church had passed away - he was the first person who greeted me when I walked in shyly 6 years ago. He would always find me when I tried to sneak in and out quietly, sitting in the back rows, and say "hello" in his booming, radio voice. This past year, he was a fixture in Wednesday evening services and Bible study. I noted with some sadness, though, that his booming voice had disappeared - he'd had a tracheotomy. But that didn't get in the way of him flirting with me and mouthing the words "Will you marry me?" whenever I said hi.

He was a warm, friendly person who still knew how to have a good laugh. I'd known he was ill and in the hospital, but I couldn't bring myself to visit him. I really wrestled with it, but it was so hard watching my father die last year that I just didn't trust my strength. I was afraid I'd cry all over him and make him feel worse. I just hope that the spirit of love he gave to everyone surrounded him in his last hours.

Whew, I'm so sorry that was so heavy. I think you need this pic to cheer you up. The best part about this teeny-tiny dog in a pink-lined wicker bag on the subway?

The boyfriend is carrying it. :) Ahem, not my boyfriend, of course, someone else's. :)

So, just a few more weeks! Any last assignments for me? :)


Linda P said...

will you be moving back to San Antonio? (I hope!?)

My assignment: eat. eat everything. And take the subway and walk a lot. Those are the things I miss the most.

camelama said...

Somewhere involving felines!

Or .... something old that is now new?

Or ... birds?

dark horse said...

Dear Floresita,
Good luck with your move! I can understand your mixed feelings. I am moving myself, in three months, from Sweden, to... NYC. And as a longtime fan of your blog, I must admit I'm a little sad, as I had hoped to one day be able to meet you and say hello in person at a craft event. Your embroidery, pictures and heartfelt writing have inspired me. You seem such a sweet and poetical person. I hope you'll be happy in Texas, and that you'll keep blogging!
Best wishes, Beatrice

Skitzo Leezra Studio said...

What a great adventure to live in NYC!
Hope the move to Texas is a positive one!

Peanut said...

Awww, you'll be fine. Just remember you can always visit. NYC is only a plane ride away. I made a big move not too long ago too - new job, new city and state, no friends, but I'm so happy I did! It's been such a great adventure.

Hope you're heading to Austin, cause that's where I'm at!


sewitsforyou said...

I hope your journey brings you much joy. Moving is tough but best of luck with it all..