Thursday, July 1, 2010
Last summer days in New York
So, I've been keeping it mum for awhile, but I might as well out with it now - I have 3 weeks left in NYC. I'm moving back home to Texas! Now, maybe you understand why I was asking you for "assignments"? I made a list of things I must do in my last days here...
My last days here - yikes that sounds so bleak - sort of like I'll be dead soon. I must choose better words. :) It's such an in-between time, feeling neither here nor there, completely. I feel all kinds of ups and downs - happy to be here, overjoyed to be going home, sad to leave, a bit frightened of the big change.
But you know, I felt the same way when I moved here 6 years ago - aside from the person I was dating, I didn't know a soul here. It was the scariest step I'd ever taken in my life. And now, here I am - in just the course of this past year I've formed friendships with people - amazing people who inspire me in every possible way. I've done things I would have never imagined. I'm filled with joy.
It's all mixed with a bit of sadness, of course. Last night I found out that a kind old gentleman from church had passed away - he was the first person who greeted me when I walked in shyly 6 years ago. He would always find me when I tried to sneak in and out quietly, sitting in the back rows, and say "hello" in his booming, radio voice. This past year, he was a fixture in Wednesday evening services and Bible study. I noted with some sadness, though, that his booming voice had disappeared - he'd had a tracheotomy. But that didn't get in the way of him flirting with me and mouthing the words "Will you marry me?" whenever I said hi.
He was a warm, friendly person who still knew how to have a good laugh. I'd known he was ill and in the hospital, but I couldn't bring myself to visit him. I really wrestled with it, but it was so hard watching my father die last year that I just didn't trust my strength. I was afraid I'd cry all over him and make him feel worse. I just hope that the spirit of love he gave to everyone surrounded him in his last hours.
Whew, I'm so sorry that was so heavy. I think you need this pic to cheer you up. The best part about this teeny-tiny dog in a pink-lined wicker bag on the subway?
The boyfriend is carrying it. :) Ahem, not my boyfriend, of course, someone else's. :)
So, just a few more weeks! Any last assignments for me? :)